What you expect, is not always the outcome

What I am about to write will maybe be a surprise to many. When I titled this what you expect is not always the outcome is because so many times in life we go through situations that we thought would play out differently. Back last year in the month of May 2013 my husband and I found out that I was pregnant. During that time my sister was getting married in Cancun, Mexico. So off I went to Mexico to share a special day with her and the family. Either way while there I started feeling some very sharp pains, they were excruciating. These pains would come and go, I had no idea what they could be. When I got back home I had my 8 week appointment, we were going to be looking for the heartbeat of my baby. Once at the doctors office she started looking and could not hear anything, since I was not sure on my last menstrual cycle date, she told me come back in two weeks. So I did, I went back again in two weeks and this time my oldest sister went with me, since my husband had to work. The doctor started to listen for the heart beat and nothing...
She then did an ultrasound and nothing. (Silence grew louder and louder in the room) I already knew what words were coming next as my eyes started to fill with water. I look at my sister as her eyes fill up with tears as well. Then the doctor says"I am sorry, I will give you some time" and she walked out of the room. All I remember at that point is God you know best and my child will be with you in Heaven. My sister turns and tells me "your baby is now in heaven." Honestly this was one of the most difficult things after my mom's breast cancer that I have had to face. I did not want to talk to anyone. When I got home I spoke with my husband and we both just sat in silence for a while. He was so supportive given the fact that he to was in pain about the situation. We prayed and asked God for enlightenment and support during this time. I prayed and prayed stronger than ever before, and wanted to just feel the love of God. As a testimony to share in my prayers that were in moments where I was alone and at the latest of nights, I just asked "God please I just need a hug from you" I knew God heard every one of my prayers, however it took months before He answered my prayer. As time passed Ray and I were able to try to get pregnant again, so in the month of October I found out I was pregnant,  I was already at least 6 weeks.
we had our first appointment everything went well. And every other appointment from there on out just got better. Then in the month of November God answers my prayer at a women's church retreat. I was being prayed for when God uses one of the ministers to pray for me and uses the minister to talk to me and say, "you have been asking for a hug and you have been humble and have come to me, here is your hug." Honestly I have never had an experience like that in all my life. As a believer it was such a huge spiritual boost for me. I knew then and there, that no matter what can be going on as long as I put everything in the Lord's hands He will provide. The sadness that I had felt about the loss of my first child suddenly became as a positive situation in my life. True it was hard to know that I lost a child, but this situation resulted in me getting closer to God. He then blessed me and my husband with another pregnancy and a wonderful one at that.  My son Ray Antoni was born
June 2,2014 he has been such a blessing and has brought us so much happiness. I do from time to time think of my baby that I lost and remember how God was in front of that situation from the beginning. Then all I can do is give Him thanks!

The day our son was born, was such a miracle and blessing to our lives. I just held him so close as soon as he came. A little about my labor, i was in labor for 20 hours and pushed for 2 1/2 hours and naturally had our son. One of the best and proudest days ever in my life. I saw my husband shed some tears for the very first time. Happy tears i must add and we were all just rejoiced with this gift from God.

Everyday is a special day with my little one, and now I get to enjoy him all the time since I now get to be a stay at home mom!

Moving

This has been a long time waiting, it has been forever since I last blogged. 

To begin with life always has its ups and downs and I have not blogged for numerous reasons.

1. Time

2.  Laziness

3. Lack of Internet

4. Computer is broken

These are just a few reasons...

Recently my husband and I have forgone many transitional stages in our almost two years of marriage. We have moved just a total of 4 times in one year, has been seriously stressful and tiring. We now have finally another apartment and will be here for a year. 

Now I will share with you all, how all this started. During the month of September my husband and I were in the process of looking for a home, we started the whole process. Well we were then told that it was not going to be possible for us to buy a home yet (I was very frustrated and sad about this at the time) We had moved in with my sister from our previous apartment since our lease was up, and we were only going to be there a couple of months, since we were planning on purchasing. Either way that fell through, so now we were stuck at my sisters house and in the looks for another rental property.

when we then find out that we are PREGNANT! Yes pregnant I was thrilled about it and so was Ray. Yet the thought of not having our own home made me sad again. Well my husband trying to be there for me and make me happy was looking all over to find a place for us to move into. Across the street from my sisters house was a tiny little three bedroom home which needed a whole whole lot of work. However my husband being so determined on us leaving asked the owner if we could rent it out. The owner said yes, well before we could even move in, the place had to be painted, cleaned out, and fixed. My husband did just that mind you the month is now February when he is fixing it. It was cold and the heat was not on yet and he would work till midnight. By this time I am already 5 months pregnant and of coarse my hormones are out of whack, I am an emotional wreck! 

Here are a few picks of the before and after:

We worked hard to get this place somewhat in livable conditions. Well as the months started passing by, it started getting warmer outside and I started to notice little things here and there. An example of this was every time i would come home from work there would be wasps inside the house. Where they came from I have no idea. Now another thing was there were constantly bugs constantly bugs coming. I got so sick of, and told Ray that we could not stay here especially with a baby on the way it just is not going to happen.

so by the month of May again we start looking for another place, when we found where we are at right now. The crazy part is that i was set to be due June 14th. We were to move in June 4th this was crazy! Either way we said "ok let's do it."

Surprise Surprise, I had my Antoni June 2nd he came about two weeks early. My husband basically moved everything that week of our baby being born. It was so stressful. That i will talk about another time though. I now just want to say that I am so thankful to God that we have a place to live and is way better than the place we were at before. I would also like to say if there are grammatical and spelling errors I am sorry, I wrote this post through my phone. I still have no computer.